


Guiding Fire

by Marorin5



Series: Of Fate and Destiny [2]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon Era, Fix-It, Fix-It of Sorts, Gen, Merlin & Morgana Friendship (Merlin), Parent Gaius (Merlin), Post-Episode: s02e03 The Nightmare Begins (Merlin)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-01
Updated: 2021-02-01
Packaged: 2021-03-18 15:55:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29120823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marorin5/pseuds/Marorin5
Summary: Merlin comes to the conclusion that to protect Morgana from discovery, she should learn some control over her magic. That way, her magic won’t act up and expose her, and she’ll be safer. It was the same for him, after all. And since she is under the impression his childhood friend Will was a sorcerer, it wouldn’t be too strange for him to know a thing or two about magic. Surely he can teach her, right?
Relationships: Gaius & Merlin (Merlin), Merlin & Morgana (Merlin)
Series: Of Fate and Destiny [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2124609
Comments: 3
Kudos: 66





	Guiding Fire

**Author's Note:**

> So this is the second installment of this story! This happens a week after the last fic. I recommend reading it so you know what’s happening, but in case you haven’t: basically, Morgana thinks Will was a sorcerer (so she knows Merlin is a supporter of magic), and Aglain’s druid camp was not destroyed. 
> 
> In the legends, Morgan le Fay is actually a student of Merlin, so I suppose the idea of Merlin teaching Morgana some spells so she can control her magic is a nod to that. 
> 
> Big thanks to my friend Gotrix for planning this whole thing with me, and for editing this! Wouldn’t be able to do this without you.

“What spells you reckon are the easiest to learn?” Merlin asks as he passes the pages of his spellbook. 

Gaius pauses in his own reading. “The easiest to learn?”

“Yup.”

“Well, you can ask yourself that. You’ve studied spells yourself.”

“Yeah, but you’ve said before that I’m not really your average sorcerer. I was born with magic. I didn’t learn it. And apparently I’m quite a big deal to the druids, being  _ Emrys _ and all.”

“It is true that you are anything but average when it comes to magic, Merlin,” Gaius says. “To have such an instinctive control of magic ever since  _ birth  _ is unheard of.”

“I know. That’s why I was wondering. I don’t actually know if the spells I find easy are actually easy for everyone, or if it’s just me.”

Gaius pauses. “What’s this about?”

“Oh, I’m just curious, is all,” Merlin says casually. 

Gaius knows better, though. “Is this about Morgana?”

Merlin winces. It’s been a week since the druids told Morgana of her magic. Merlin and Gaius don’t talk about what happened, not really. They both know they did what each thought was best, but they never breached the topic again. 

“Uh, yeah,” Merlin replies. If he lied, Gaius would just figure it out anyway; and they’d fought over this topic too much already. 

“And you want to know what spells are easy to learn,” Gaius mutters. Then his eyes widen, as if something finally clicks, and he straightens. “Don’t tell me you actually want to teach her magic!” 

He sounds quite outraged. Merlin bits his lip. “Maybe?”

“Of course.” Gaius’ body seems to deflate and he gives an all-suffering sigh. “Of course you want to. You really can’t stay out of things that don't concern you, can you?”

“It does concern me, though,” Merlin argues. “She has magic. I can help her.”

“And yet, if Uther finds out, trust me that you’ll be the first in line to the pyre,” Gaius says, and the look in his eyes is of a man that has seen such a thing happen many, many times. 

“I know.”

“She can’t know of your magic, Merlin.”

“She doesn’t.”

“And how do you possibly intend to teach her magic, then? How could you possibly justify having any knowledge of magic without exposing yourself?”

“Will,” Merlin replies. Gaius raises his eyebrow. “My friend from Ealdor. They think he was a sorcerer,” he says softly, feeling a small tinge of sadness when he thinks of his friend’s death. 

Gaius’ eyes soften. When Merlin came back from Ealdor, he told Gaius all about Will, including how he died taking credit of his magic so Merlin could come back to Camelot safely. Gaius was his main support when he’d been dealing with his grief over Will’s death. 

The others allowed him to mourn, of course, but they had all been raised knowing of the ‘evil of sorcery’, and they weren’t completely sure how to act about it. Gwen hugged him and helped him if he needed to and made sure he was as okay as he could be, but she never seemed to know what to say. Arthur didn’t seem to know how to feel or do about the situation, but other than his—frankly, unnecessary, and very insensitive—comment about magic being evil at Will’s funeral, he never gave Merlin any grief for mourning a sorcerer. Even Morgana didn’t seem to know what to do. Somehow, the way the three ended up dealing with it was just not talking about Will. 

For the most part, that was fine. Merlin kept busy on purpose to keep his grief from taking over him, and not talking about Will helped. But in the night, when he had nothing to do and no way to distract himself from the memories and the pain, Gaius was there. He listened to every story, every anecdote, everything Merlin had to say, and Merlin could not express just how glad he was for it. 

“I know that,” Gaius says softly. 

“Morgana thinks I know a thing or two about magic, from being friends with Will. So, I thought I could use that, say I remember a couple of the spells Will knew and teach her.”

“It is still incredibly dangerous. Even if you supposedly are not a sorcerer, you’d still be teaching the King’s ward how to use magic. If anyone were to find out, there would be no way to get you out of it.”

“I know it’s dangerous. But Gaius, imagine what would happen if Morgana’s magic were to act up again. Imagine if it happened in front of the king. I don’t know if being his ward would save her.”

“...No,” agrees Gaius. “We don’t know.”

“Morgana’s magic acts up when she’s distressed, right? Even if she is not afraid of her magic anymore, she still has it and she is the king’s ward. That has to be terrifying, especially if she can’t control it. If she is distressed, then her magic will react, and then she’ll become more distressed. It’s a vicious cycle. But if she learns a spell or two, then maybe she’ll be able to get her magic under control and she won’t risk exposure, and that’ll give her stability.”

“You seem to have thought this out,” Gaius comments. 

Merlin shrugs. “Well, it’s what happened to me. I always had my magic, and I always had some degree of instinctual control over it, but sometimes it would do things without me wanting it to, and that was terrifying. Especially since I couldn’t risk exposure. I probably worried Mother a lot.” Merlin smiles, but it's small, and a bit sad. Hunith used to be so scared about him potentially being found out and the consequences of it (dead, a slave, a weapon), she was willing to send him to Camelot—the very kingdom magic was first banned on pain of death—if it meant he could learn how to control his magic with the help of her half-brother, the only person she trusted would never betray them. "It was also harder to control when I was emotional. Coming here and learning magic from you helped me. Perhaps something like that will help Morgana, too.”

“Yes, I do see your point.” Gaius is silent for a couple beats. “If you’re going to go with the story of Will being a sorcerer, then you need to figure out a proper story. Make sure you won’t be caught in a lie if she asks too many questions.”

Merlin nods. He’s actually delighted Gaius seems to want to help him on this. Gaius was so sure of himself about how to handle Morgana just one week ago, and yet now he seems willing to listen to Merlin and help him. “You’re right. I should probably do that, shouldn’t I?” His tone doesn’t sound as light as he wants it to, and Gaius notices. 

“Merlin?” Gaius asks quietly, after a moment of silence. “Are you truly okay with this? Using the lie that Will was a sorcerer?”

“I think Will would understand,” Merlin says quietly. “He was a jerk. An absolute twat. Hated nobility with all he had. Loved getting into trouble. Hated authority. But he was a good person. He didn’t turn on me when he found out about my magic. He stayed, and he let me be myself, and he didn’t make me feel like a freak. He was good. I think… I think Will would be glad I used his lie, if it meant helping someone else. Someone like me.”

“I understand,” Gaius says. “Well then.” He goes and sits across Merlin. “The best thing we can do is to make your story full of half truths. Those are the easiest lies to tell, and the most believable as well.”

“You’re gonna help me?” Merlin asks, surprised, but smiling widely. 

Gaius scoffs, but it’s good natured. “Of course I’m going to help you. I worry about what kind of foolish story you’d invent on your own. Now, come on, let’s get to work. We don’t have all night.”

“Yes, Gaius,” Merlin says, trying to sound forced, but he’s grinning too widely.

* * *

The story of William of Ealdor being a sorcerer is the following: 

Will’s (nonexistent) uncle (who is not at all based on Gaius) came to Ealdor a couple of years ago to stay with Will’s family. He noticed Will’s interest in magic (Will did have an interest in magic—Merlin’s magic, to be specific) and decided to teach the young boy some magic (not unlike how Gaius guided Merlin and gave him the magic book). 

Usually, magic takes years of study for most people, but Will had a knack for magic and learned quickly (not unlike Merlin, and very unlike Gaius). 

Merlin discovered Will had magic (like when Will discovered Merlin had it) and since then, Will would show him his magic, the things he’d learned and how to do them (like Merlin had, when Will accepted him). Merlin was supportive of Will and his magic (like Will had been of him) and they would go to the caves near Ealdor most often than not to play around with his magic and get into all types of trouble (this is actually true). 

All in all, the story of Will being a sorcerer ended up being a strange mix of Gaius and Merlin’s stories, with Merlin and Will’s ‘roles’—so to speak—being switched. But it works, and that’s what matters.

* * *

“My Lady?” 

Morgana smiles when she opens the door and sees Merlin. “Hello, Merlin. To what do I owe this pleasure?” 

“I just wanted to see how you were doing.”

“I’m doing much better, thank you for asking,” she says as she ushers him inside her chambers and closes the door. “This week… I’ve been calmer than I have been in a long time, I think. It’s reassuring to know what… what was happening to me. What I have. That it’s not something to be feared.” 

“Of course not,” Merlin replies. He understands what she is saying, of course he does. He remembers how he felt before he came to Camelot. How he thought he was cursed. Now he knows he has a gift. And so does Morgana. “Uther is wrong. I know it can seem like a curse sometimes, but really, you have a gift.”

Morgana scoffs. “Uther will never accept he’s wrong,” she says, her voice hard. Then she softens. “But you’re right. It is a gift.”

“Yeah,” Merlin smiles, but then he turns his face serious. “Having magic—even knowing it is a gift—must be scary though, especially if you don’t know how to control it.”

Morgana tenses and Merlin knows he’s hit the nail in the head. “I… it-it can be, yes.” 

“I was thinking,” he looks back at the door to ensure it’s closed and no one can listen in before continuing, “maybe I can help you control it.”

Morgana looks confused, but there’s also a hint of hope in her eyes. “And how could you do that?” 

“Will’s uncle was a sorcerer,” he explains. “He was the one who taught Will magic. He came to Ealdor some day, decided to teach Will some magic when he showed some interest. I was already friends with Will at the time, and… well, we were young. I guess at the beginning, neither of us dimensioned how dangerous it could be…”  _ Having magic. Being a sorcerer. Being hated for what you are.  _ Merlin is sure both he and Morgana heard those words left unsaid. “Well, you know. Anyway. He would show me what he learned. How to do it. He loved to show off, the twat,” Merlin chuckles fondly. That, at least, is true. “I remember some things. A couple of spells.”

“I see.” Morgana frowns, seemingly considering something. “I’m curious, though. If you don’t mind me asking.”

“Yeah?”

“If you don’t have any problem with magic, and your friend was learning it, why didn’t you learn it yourself?”

“I couldn’t,” Merlin replies, feeling a bit guilty. The worst part is that his answer is not a lie, but he knows Morgana is going to misunderstand his reply. The truth is, he couldn’t learn magic, because there was no one to teach him. But Morgana is going to think that he could not learn it because he’s not able to actually wield any magic. “Still… I think I might be able to teach you how to do it.”

Hope shines in Morgana’s emerald gaze. “You think you can?” 

“I think so,” Merlin nods. “I know  _ how _ . I just…” He doesn’t say anything, and Morgana nods. She thinks he knows how, but can’t do it. If only she knew… Honestly, a part of himself is amazed at how he’s gotten so far without ever outright denying he has magic. “It wouldn’t be anything complicated. I… Obviously, this is just me theorizing, but if you were to learn a few spells, then maybe you could keep your magic under your control.”

“That does make sense…” she says thoughtfully. 

“Are you willing to try?” 

“Yes,” Morgana nods. She smiles at him—a smile full of appreciation and  _ trust _ —and it makes him feel incredibly guilty. Merlin is not sure he’s worth that look, with all the lies he’s been telling. “It’s worth a try. When do we start?”

Merlin smiles at her eagerness. “Whenever you want to.”

“Great! Let’s start now, if that’s okay with you?” 

“Yeah, sure,” Merlin agrees. “I was thinking we should start with a fire spell.” 

Morgana pauses, and he can see some of her fear from the fire she caused show on her face. “Fire?”

“Yeah, since you accidentally caused a fire,” Merlin explains. “I think it would be a good idea to learn how to control fire. You know, make it, put it out. So that something like that won’t happen again.” 

“I… see…” There’s trepidation in her voice. 

Merlin backtracks. “But if you want we can do something else—”

“No, you’re right,” Morgana swallows her fear. She looks determined. “Let’s do this.”

* * *

Morgana has not been this frustrated in quite some time. It’s been over a week—ten days, to be exact; she’s been counting—and she has not been able to light up that fucking candle yet. Well, to be fair, it’s not like she is all day trying to light it up. She only tries in the night, when Merlin sneaks into her chambers and tries to guide her on how to use her magic. But still… ten days, and still nothing. 

“ _ Forbearnan _ ,” Morgana whispers angrily, trying to reach for her magic in the way Merlin has told her to. Nothing happens. “ _ Forbearnan _ !” 

Nothing. 

“Damn it!” Morgana wants to grab the stupid candle and throw it out the window, but she stops herself. She feels tears in the corner of her eyes, and he hates it. She refuses to cry. Not for this. “It won’t work!” 

“Hey, you’ll get the hang of it,” Merlin assures her patiently. A day or two ago those words might have comforted her. Now they just anger her. “It must be difficult because you’ve never done a spell before. Your magic only acted involuntarily, so maybe that’s why…” 

“Oh, surely Will didn’t take this long to learn such a  _ simple  _ spell,” Morgana shoots back and Merlin winces. 

“I don’t really know how long it took him to learn this specifically, but it’s not like he just did spells with no practice. There’s people who have to study magic for  _ years  _ to even use it.”

“But I’ve  _ used  _ it before!” Morgana argues. She will not cry. She won’t. “I know I have it. I know it can be used. I made a fire! I’ve already done it before, even if I didn’t want to, so why is it that I can’t do this god damned spell?!” 

There’s a bit of silence. “Maybe it’s not you. Maybe I’m just a shit teacher,” Merlin says ruefully. 

“What? No! Of course not!” Morgana argues. She hates how Merlin seems to think it’s his fault she can’t seem to use her magic, when he’s the one who sneaks into her chambers every night, who brought her the spell, taught her how to pronounce it correctly, and has stayed with her and guided her. “You’ve been such a great help.”

“You’re just being kind.” 

“No,” Morgana shakes her head. “I mean it. I wouldn’t even know where to start if you weren’t here. Your words… About trying to reach my magic and draw it out. I don’t know how to explain, but they just… make sense. It’s like you know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh, you know,” Merlin waves his hand, looking a bit flustered. It’s kind of cute, a distracted part of her notes. “Just saying things I heard Will say.”

“Well, clearly they are the right thing to say,” Morgana smiles. 

“If that’s the case… Lets try again, okay?” Merlin asks, and Morgana nods. “Close your eyes,” he instructs. She obeys. “Try not to think of anything. Clear your head, all that. And concentrate on looking deep inside you… Your magic is a part of you, Morgana. It’s there. You just need to reach out to find it.” 

Morgana tries. She looks for that power she has, and—as has been the case for these last ten days—she can’t find it. She sighs deeply, and concentrates. She won’t give up.  _ Your magic is part of you.  _ Yes. It is. And she will find it. 

Suddenly, she feels something. Some kind of… energy. Power. There it is. There it is! She feels exhilaration at the feeling. She already knew she had magic, but she’d never taken the time to  _ feel _ it. It is there. Responding to her call. This is it. Reach out for it! Reach it!

“ _ Forbearnan _ ,” she says, her voice strong, and her eyes flash gold. The candle lits, the fire coming alive in front of her eyes. “I did it!” 

“You did it!” Merlin exclaims, a big smile on his face. 

“Merlin!” She hugs the servant, laughing happily. “I did it! I finally did it!” 

“Yes, you did!” Merlin hugs her back. “I’m so proud of you!”

And Morgana laughs, feeling happier than she has been in a long, long time. She’s still a witch in Camelot, and that danger is not something easily forgotten, but for one moment; one small moment, as she and Merlin hug to celebrate and her magic runs in her veins, everything feels perfect. 

**Author's Note:**

> The next fic will feature two of my favorite characters. One of them who I believe definitely deserved better than what he got. Especially since he could have done so much more. The show didn’t really give him the chance, but we will! So, hopefully you guys can look forward to that!


End file.
